zNSFW

Adultconnect

How do you confuse a blind person? Toss them a basketball and ask them to read it.
Hey, is your name Paul Revere? Because I want to give you a midnight ride!
I got tasered by a female cop the other night.. never have I laid eyes upon a more
My toilet stopped working today. He decided he's had enough of my shit
"honey don't you think you're treating one of our kids unfairly?" "who?
There's a black man in my family tree... He's been hanging there for a while now.
If we have learned anything from the Friday the 13th movies, it's that Jason mainly
I wonder if Bruce Wayne ever wears a Batman t-shirt.
What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you assholes.
Its poor! But, What happens when Supper stars fart in public? lol
What's the difference between an illegal Mexican and an autonomous robot...? Nothing...
What's the difference between an illegal Mexican and an autonomous robot...? Nothing...
I visited Amsterdam this summer, and decided to have sex with a prostitute. It was
It's comforting to know that the US government works the same way as a college student
I tried googling Wiz Khalifa ... But all I found was MIa Khalifa peeing .
What did the Marine Biologist say when he saw two eels making love? "It's a
Having the option to erase and re-record after having to leave a voicemail is one
Browsing this sub is like mining in a cave Full of bat shit and I mostly get the
What is the favorite food joint of dubstep makers? Sub-WUB-WUB-WUB-way
What do you call a blonde in a BMW? Optional.
What idiot called her a Hot Indian Girl and not a Bomb Bae
What do you call a racist dog from Animal Crossing? KKK Slider
What is the internal temperature of a tauntaun? Luke warm
*Guy tries giving me his phone number* Me: Oh no thank you. I already have one
What do you call Jay-Z having a leg transplant? A hip-hop hip op.
In China the labels read, "Made by someone you know."
Donald Trump Does this count as putting the punchline in the title?
Pokemon Go has really improved my life... I used to always get in trouble for playing
Jared Fogle was guilty and got 16 years He was just grateful for anything under 18.
A Bug's Mind What's the last thing that goes through a bug's mind when he crashes
My best friend and I were comparing our penises... for who has the biggest. It ended
What's the difference between coriander and cumin? You can't coriander your pants.
Orange Julius is the third best thing to happen to oranges behind mimosas and the
Prostitutes hate trick-or-treaters.
asdf3333
Where do you find an enlightened mosquito? In Bhuddapest
Why did the Canadian cross the road? Because that's the direction his car was sliding.
What did the wise man say to the fat guy? You should probably go on a diet.
What do you call kangarooo jump and play hocky? the fam copter
Now what's on the menu? Me-n-u
When are they going to drug test the audience of "The Price Is Right."?
I like my steak like I like my women. White and domineering.
This hating of people who breast feed in public places has to stop! I'll raise my
I complained to my wife that I was short staffed at work She responded "yeah,
Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they could spend
Pro tip: If a woman asks you how she looks, the correct answer is not "like
I like Tuesday simply because it is literally the furthest from next Monday I can
What did Jay say when Adnan opened the trunk? Hae girl Hae
A woman's JJ sized breasts saved her life in a car accident. Those same breasts were
[at my funeral] So young, how did he die? He ran into oncoming traffic after walking
"What's that?" A divorce jar. Every time we fight you put a dollar in and
Descartes walks into the bar. The bartender asks him, "will you have your usual
What's the worse thing to do to a blind person? Leave a plunger in the toilet
What did one tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing they were both stuck up cunts.
What do grandparents smell like? "Depends"
wer
Steve wrote home. 'I'm glad you named me Steve' he said in the letter. 'Why?' asked
Finally got around to shaving my crotch after a few years. Its nice to see my knees
How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.
What did the hillbilly say to his sister after she asked him to have sex with her?

category index

contact/abuse

zNSFW.com